Okay folks, I like to consider myself one who sincerely looks at my flaws and tries to correct them in an effort to be a better person. When given constructive criticism I take what is said and wisely use that information as a tool to better myself. I do not think a person's perception of me as all truth but I listen and try to improve when and where I can.
There is a man who has come into my experience and for the past few months he has been sharing with me what he considers to be some pretty sound doctrine regarding dating and male/female interaction from a “self help” book entitled, Play or Be Played by Tariq Nasheed. In this book Tariq is giving women insight on how they can become better women and attract a man of means or a "King" by doing a certain things.
Now some of the things he brings up in the book are interesting I will say, but I do not think I would brand them gospel or use them as a template to live by.
Things that stick out most in my mind the most from the materials I was given are the things I have heard Mr. Genius, the guy who gave the book to read and a podcast to listen to repeat to me over and over again over the past couple of months. And as I read they probably stuck out the most because I have heard them from Mr. Genius numerous times. Things like a lot of black women need to work on their weight, and if white women can do it, why can't a sister. White girl is up at 4am working out why can’t black women do that? I find that Tariq and the two followers I have encountered seem to make a lot of comparison between black and white women. I feel like a man that wants a black woman who makes decisions based on what a women of another race is doing, he should matter find himself a woman of that race. You cannot buy Toyota and put a Lexus kit on it and expect people to think you have a GS300. All you have is a Toyota that you want to look like a Lexus. And I am not saying black women as a whole shouldn’t try to be healthier and be healthier for self, but thin does not equal healthy all by itself nor does it necessarily make someone more attractive or equal beauty in every mans eyes. And Mr. Tariq does not speak of eating healthier or more natural or all organic, in his book he references the fact that weight loss and gain is mathematics which is true and that you need to burn more calories that what you take in. So basically, men are not necessarily looking for us to be healthy so long as our appearance is esthetically pleasing to them. You can have all the high blood pressure and diabetes you want so long as you hit the gym and burn the calories to maintain a certain shape that will please a man enough for him to take interest in you. It is a fact you can eat cake all day and not gain weight so long as you and burn the calories off you will be able to maintain your size or lose weight depending on how much you work out per the nutritionist I work with. But that doesn’t make you happy.
If a single woman has a child or children it is seen as a mark against her and she needs to compensate for that in other ways in order to attract a decent man or a man of means. So a single woman who is a parent should work hard in one or even multiple areas in her life in order to make up for her “shortcoming” of having a child out of wedlock or being divorced since Kings or men of means see them as “baggage”. Sure, most of society and not just men have a negative view of unmarried women with children and society as a whole tends to look down on single motherhood, but I don't. Granted it is not an ideal situation and not how God intended for us to live and raise children but I do not feel like I am less of a person or deserve to be treated like I am less of a person because of it. Mental instability and substance abuse issues are baggage a mate who is insecure or needy is baggage my child is not, and I have no respect for any man or women that sees him as such nor do I need an individual in my life who feels like they can look down on my or judge me or give or take away brownie points because of it. Ladies, the best way to eliminate excess baggage is to get that sorry fits the physical description of a man black, white or orange that views your child as baggage up off your couch or bed or your phone line and find one whose views are not so jaded.
Now this was my favorite part, once a woman gets a man all it takes to keep him is to be able to cook and give oral sex. Now this may be true for a lesser man who only sees his woman as a sexual object and maid, but for a grown man who really knows who he is and can think for himself, and not base his identity or his level of character on what Mr. Nasheed says it should be, this misogynistic way of thinking won’t fly for a woman who knows her worth. Unfortunately many women don’t and most will do whatever they have to get a man even if it means belittling herself. A man who is really looking for a mate to be a partner and companion needs a woman whose worth goes beyond her Superhead capabilities and Bobby Flay skills set. He has to know he can trust her to take care of his children and represent his household amongst other in a positive manner, but you don’t hear about much of that in the book. But then again for the men who follow Tariq’s teachings, we really don’t have to have any real intellectual skills or demonstrate them after we get our man so long as we can put our man in the presence of someone who does. I guess that old saying it’s now what you know it’s who you know is true when it comes to picking a mate as well out of this group of men. I say that because in the book the author stated that a black man of financial means might be better off marrying a white woman of financial means whether inherited or independently earned. And what really upset me was when he said, if a brother needs to ask his women about financial advice if she is white even though she may not have the answer herself she may have the resources to put him in contact with someone who could assist him. Now he didn't say that it was impossible to find black women with these capabilities, but they are a rare breed. Now my mother’s financial planner Brandon left Merrill Lynch right before the economy turned but his co-worker Aaron seems to do a good job and has given my mother some really sound advice over the past few months in regards to her investments. My friend Leslie has given some sound advice when it comes to diversifying my investment option for my 401K and I believe she got her insight from her mother. My friend Kira has built up an awesome ING portfolio over the past year after I suggested she open the account and DeAnna gets some pretty sound investment advise from her brother who is independently wealthy all of which are Black women. Maybe be are just that rare breed Tariq was talking about.
Now I said all of that because I am a bit offended because Mr. Genius, like I said earlier has been talking to me about this for a few months now repeatedly and even took it a step further by giving me the materials he felt I should read in order to gain further insight needed to step my game up. That is if once he leads the horse to water it actually takes a drink.
Now that is all fine and dandy if his intentions are to help me. But when someone not always but quite frequently is pointing these topics out to you what would you think and how would you take it. If you are a black woman who does not fit into the category some would consider an attractive size and someone was almost always talking to you about black women and weight how would you take it or if you were a single mother and you had to hear on more than one occasion that single mothers should step their game up in order to compete would you not feel like someone was trying to let you know that your position was one of inferiority to other single women without children. Now Mr. Genius was kind enough to let me know that he feels like I have potential (I guess in spite of…) and was just trying to help me upgrade myself. But in my opinion, there is a difference between giving someone a little advice in an effort to let them know from your perspective how they can show improve, and constantly letting them know their inadequacies from your vantage point. And when I say repeatedly, I mean I hear it quite often from, it is actually almost all we talk about, how I can better myself and step my game up in an effort to compensate for my shortcomings when it is direct, when it is indirect the comments are usually about black women. At this point not only are my feelings hurt, but I am offended. I even asked Mr. Genius this morning, “If each time I saw you I asked you if you brushed your teeth this morning how would you feel.” He acted as if I was taking what he was doing out of context. He has also said I am a bit sensitive which I do not think is true.
Needless to say I have cut all ties with Mr. Genius as our interaction is not healthy nor is it the type of friendship I need at this point in my life.
Let me know what you think, am I reading what is truly intended to be a kind gesture or nudge in the right direction out of context. And how many times should someone share advice with a friend or acquaintance before it becomes naggingly inappropriate.
As previously state I have no problem working on me and fixing the things I can.
j
Monday, April 6, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Mark of the Beast
Over the next couple of weeks, I will be sharing what I hope to be thought provoking information regarding End Times prophecy. Contrary to what you may believe, this information is not intended to create in you the spirit of fear, nor is it designed to place you on the edge, but instead its purpose is to elevate your level of awareness to the fact that the emanate return of Jesus Christ, also known as Maranatha, is at hand. We, unlike any other generation, are living in a day where technological advances, human behavior and political alliances are paving the way for end time prophecies that were given through scripture to come to fruition.
The VeriChip was the first RFID to be approved by the Food and Drug Administration. Radio Frequency Identification (RFID) refers to technologies that utilize radio waves to automatically identify individual items. When RFID first emerged, it was used in tracking and access applications. Since then, it has developed as a robust technology with ever increasing processing speeds, wider reading ranges, and larger memory capacities.
At the size of a grain of rice, the microchip inserts just under the skin and contains a unique, 16-digit identifier. The chip itself does not contain any other data other than this unique electronic ID, nor does it contain any Global Positioning System (GPS) tracking, however tracking capabilities are available.
Once implanted, the VeriChip is scanned with a handheld or fixed-mount device called a reader that emits electromagnetic (radio) waves. These waves can range from one inch to 100 feet and is dependent on power output and the radio frequency being used. This small amount of radio frequency energy passes from the reader energizing the dormant microchip, which then emits a radio frequency signal transmitting the individual’s unique verification number. This number can then be used for purposes such as accessing personal medical or financial information in a password-protected database, as well as assessing whether somebody has authority to enter into a high-security area.
I am not making a claim that the VeriChip is the mark of the beast; however it is surely a strong template for the anti-Christ to work with. The VeriChip is currently being implanted in infants and elderly people with chronic illnesses as a way to keep record of and have convenient access to medical information. The chip is also being used to track household pets and animals, as well as a tool to identify and track human remains recovered during major catastrophes like hurricane Katrina.
Revelations 13:15-17 reads, 15 the second beast was allowed to give breath to the statue so it could speak. He was allowed to kill all who refused to worship the statue. 16 He also forced everyone to receive a mark on the right hand or on the forehead. People great or small, rich or poor, free or slave had to receive the mark. 17 They could not buy or sell anything unless they had the mark. The mark is the name of the beast or the number of his name.
Revelations 14:9-11 reads, And another angel, a third, followed them, saying with a loud voice, “If anyone worships the beast and its image and receives a mark on his forehead or on his hand, he also will drink the wine of God's wrath, poured full strength into the cup of his anger, and he will be tormented with fire and sulfur in the presence of the holy angels and in the presence of the Lamb. And the smoke of their torment goes up forever and ever, and they have no rest, day or night, these worshipers of the beast and its image, and whoever receives the mark of its name.”
We the Ecclesia, also known as the church of God, must keep our eyes and ears open in preparation for Maranatha, the coming of Christ. It is most important that we know what the Word of God says, in order to be able to guard ourselves and warn others against the enemy as the stage is being set for the Ecclesia to be caught up and the anti-Christ to step on the scene.
Saints of God, Be Ye Also ready.
The VeriChip was the first RFID to be approved by the Food and Drug Administration. Radio Frequency Identification (RFID) refers to technologies that utilize radio waves to automatically identify individual items. When RFID first emerged, it was used in tracking and access applications. Since then, it has developed as a robust technology with ever increasing processing speeds, wider reading ranges, and larger memory capacities.
At the size of a grain of rice, the microchip inserts just under the skin and contains a unique, 16-digit identifier. The chip itself does not contain any other data other than this unique electronic ID, nor does it contain any Global Positioning System (GPS) tracking, however tracking capabilities are available.
Once implanted, the VeriChip is scanned with a handheld or fixed-mount device called a reader that emits electromagnetic (radio) waves. These waves can range from one inch to 100 feet and is dependent on power output and the radio frequency being used. This small amount of radio frequency energy passes from the reader energizing the dormant microchip, which then emits a radio frequency signal transmitting the individual’s unique verification number. This number can then be used for purposes such as accessing personal medical or financial information in a password-protected database, as well as assessing whether somebody has authority to enter into a high-security area.
I am not making a claim that the VeriChip is the mark of the beast; however it is surely a strong template for the anti-Christ to work with. The VeriChip is currently being implanted in infants and elderly people with chronic illnesses as a way to keep record of and have convenient access to medical information. The chip is also being used to track household pets and animals, as well as a tool to identify and track human remains recovered during major catastrophes like hurricane Katrina.
Revelations 13:15-17 reads, 15 the second beast was allowed to give breath to the statue so it could speak. He was allowed to kill all who refused to worship the statue. 16 He also forced everyone to receive a mark on the right hand or on the forehead. People great or small, rich or poor, free or slave had to receive the mark. 17 They could not buy or sell anything unless they had the mark. The mark is the name of the beast or the number of his name.
Revelations 14:9-11 reads, And another angel, a third, followed them, saying with a loud voice, “If anyone worships the beast and its image and receives a mark on his forehead or on his hand, he also will drink the wine of God's wrath, poured full strength into the cup of his anger, and he will be tormented with fire and sulfur in the presence of the holy angels and in the presence of the Lamb. And the smoke of their torment goes up forever and ever, and they have no rest, day or night, these worshipers of the beast and its image, and whoever receives the mark of its name.”
We the Ecclesia, also known as the church of God, must keep our eyes and ears open in preparation for Maranatha, the coming of Christ. It is most important that we know what the Word of God says, in order to be able to guard ourselves and warn others against the enemy as the stage is being set for the Ecclesia to be caught up and the anti-Christ to step on the scene.
Saints of God, Be Ye Also ready.
Friday, March 6, 2009
THERE IS NO MORE ROPE.....
............SERIOUSLY.
For those of you who read my last post. Things were not going so well, but I was slightly optimistic that they would get better. And after I had my little rant, I really just sat back and chilled because I did feel really childish for complaining, after all life is life and we all go through rough patches.
But then things didn't get better, despite my efforts, but still I didn't complain. I tried to make the best of my 30th Birthday with the help of my extremely sweet friends here in Dallas despite the fact I really wasn't feeling much like doing anything.
I literally make it from day to day because I am able to cope. I can't keep coping. I have put my foot to the pavement to better things yet my efforts are always stopped for this reason or another. And although I am my and come with my misgivings and shortcomings I am really not that bad of a person. So why it that week after week I get blindsided with crap. I mean literally my outlook now is be prepared for the next boulder to shatter what small amount of peace you have so that way I am not shocked when it happens. And I know I am not dealing with any severe, it is just that I keep having these things happen without any let up.
I was at home on my lunch break doing laundry and I hop in my car and it does not start. This is the same car, I just put more than $1000.00 into just a few weeks ago that I still have a car not on. So I automatically think me being me I just waited too long to change the battery in my key. So I go to the dealership so conveniently located right down the street from my house only to discover what I thought to be a $10.00 quick-fix is actually a $800 to $1200 issue.
REALLY........
I mean seriously, I can deal with the fact that my life isn't going to be all roses, but does it have to be filled with thorns. Hell I am not even asking for petals anymore just give my a little stem.
And I know I know I am just being tested. But unlike Job I am obviously not up for the challenge. Especially when the there seems to be no end to the test. I am on question 153,225,325 and my #2 pencils has been sharpened down to the eraser.
I don't complain about being a single parent, as that is a situation I got myself into. I don't complain about being sexless as I know I am single and I am trying to what is right. I don't complain about not having extra money so long as I have enough to take care of the necessities. I don't even complain when I am feel alone and lonely since I chose to move to Dallas 1348 miles away from the people who love me most. I have tried not to complain about not getting sleep since I have a comfy bed to lay in. I don't complain when it's a little chilly and I can't afford to turn the heat on since I have a really cool fire place and tons of sweaters and blankets. But really. Now is where I start complaining.
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I mean ridiculous. I literally don't know what to do at this point. My options/solution/remedy box is bare. Are you there God it's me Jasmine by myself without the slightest clue of what to next. And all I ask is even though I know it is customary when you Satan talk to point those who really are trying, can you PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take your finger off of me for a little while. Just a little while, because really I am one paycheck from being homeless especially since the next two paychecks are about to go to Ewing Autohaus and although I would be able to cope (because I think I have one more scoop left and the ability to literally just check out mentally) my child does not deserve the misfortune soon to be bestowed upon us because I can't figure it out.
Over the edge and throwing in the towel.
j
For those of you who read my last post. Things were not going so well, but I was slightly optimistic that they would get better. And after I had my little rant, I really just sat back and chilled because I did feel really childish for complaining, after all life is life and we all go through rough patches.
But then things didn't get better, despite my efforts, but still I didn't complain. I tried to make the best of my 30th Birthday with the help of my extremely sweet friends here in Dallas despite the fact I really wasn't feeling much like doing anything.
I literally make it from day to day because I am able to cope. I can't keep coping. I have put my foot to the pavement to better things yet my efforts are always stopped for this reason or another. And although I am my and come with my misgivings and shortcomings I am really not that bad of a person. So why it that week after week I get blindsided with crap. I mean literally my outlook now is be prepared for the next boulder to shatter what small amount of peace you have so that way I am not shocked when it happens. And I know I am not dealing with any severe, it is just that I keep having these things happen without any let up.
I was at home on my lunch break doing laundry and I hop in my car and it does not start. This is the same car, I just put more than $1000.00 into just a few weeks ago that I still have a car not on. So I automatically think me being me I just waited too long to change the battery in my key. So I go to the dealership so conveniently located right down the street from my house only to discover what I thought to be a $10.00 quick-fix is actually a $800 to $1200 issue.
REALLY........
I mean seriously, I can deal with the fact that my life isn't going to be all roses, but does it have to be filled with thorns. Hell I am not even asking for petals anymore just give my a little stem.
And I know I know I am just being tested. But unlike Job I am obviously not up for the challenge. Especially when the there seems to be no end to the test. I am on question 153,225,325 and my #2 pencils has been sharpened down to the eraser.
I don't complain about being a single parent, as that is a situation I got myself into. I don't complain about being sexless as I know I am single and I am trying to what is right. I don't complain about not having extra money so long as I have enough to take care of the necessities. I don't even complain when I am feel alone and lonely since I chose to move to Dallas 1348 miles away from the people who love me most. I have tried not to complain about not getting sleep since I have a comfy bed to lay in. I don't complain when it's a little chilly and I can't afford to turn the heat on since I have a really cool fire place and tons of sweaters and blankets. But really. Now is where I start complaining.
THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I mean ridiculous. I literally don't know what to do at this point. My options/solution/remedy box is bare. Are you there God it's me Jasmine by myself without the slightest clue of what to next. And all I ask is even though I know it is customary when you Satan talk to point those who really are trying, can you PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take your finger off of me for a little while. Just a little while, because really I am one paycheck from being homeless especially since the next two paychecks are about to go to Ewing Autohaus and although I would be able to cope (because I think I have one more scoop left and the ability to literally just check out mentally) my child does not deserve the misfortune soon to be bestowed upon us because I can't figure it out.
Over the edge and throwing in the towel.
j
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
The Rope Is Just About Gone
So,
I am here in Dallas pretty much all by myself, which was not a big deal when I moved out here because I had a grip on my life back home.
I had a healthy and happy child, dependable transportation and enough time with my support system to try to figure out how to juggle things on my own.
Well I get here and my car is no longer as dependable as it was when there were two others in driveway for me to drive and my son has not been as healthy as he once was (but will be soon)
I finally get to a point to where all my credit card bills are paid and I pay off my $800.00 electricity bill while fighting with Green Mountain Energy to fix whatever is wrong and causing this issue only to be smacked in the face with a $350.00 for this months payment.
That on top of the always unexpected Dr.s bills for Joe only to pay Dr.s who refuse to look any deeper than what they want to see appointment after appointment only to be sent home with a child who is still in pain and wakes up periodically through the night. Sometimes he just lays there quietly, and other times he wants someone to complain to or someone to be up with him.
So I am running on way less than a full tank of gas. My eyes literally burn all day I am so tired and needless to say at the end of my rope.
And to be here in Dallas all alone with noone to really talk to face to face (who is older than 10). And I am not usually a woulda coulda shoulda person, but had I not moved to Dallas I would not have so many miles and so much ware on my car, my son never would have been in a pool as we lived in a state where there are beaches and he never would have gotten sick and he wouldn't be suffering now and I would not be so tired nor would I look like Tammy Fae Baker did on her last Larry King interview. I looks like the Alamo was fought on my face. Dallas has aged, not to mention I have not had a real facial in almost two years.
In trying to make good decisions I seem to always end up screwed. What is it about my thought process of the way I see things happening or panning out that is so jaded.
I honestly and truly need more rope. And this time i promise I wont hang myself with it.
I am here in Dallas pretty much all by myself, which was not a big deal when I moved out here because I had a grip on my life back home.
I had a healthy and happy child, dependable transportation and enough time with my support system to try to figure out how to juggle things on my own.
Well I get here and my car is no longer as dependable as it was when there were two others in driveway for me to drive and my son has not been as healthy as he once was (but will be soon)
I finally get to a point to where all my credit card bills are paid and I pay off my $800.00 electricity bill while fighting with Green Mountain Energy to fix whatever is wrong and causing this issue only to be smacked in the face with a $350.00 for this months payment.
That on top of the always unexpected Dr.s bills for Joe only to pay Dr.s who refuse to look any deeper than what they want to see appointment after appointment only to be sent home with a child who is still in pain and wakes up periodically through the night. Sometimes he just lays there quietly, and other times he wants someone to complain to or someone to be up with him.
So I am running on way less than a full tank of gas. My eyes literally burn all day I am so tired and needless to say at the end of my rope.
And to be here in Dallas all alone with noone to really talk to face to face (who is older than 10). And I am not usually a woulda coulda shoulda person, but had I not moved to Dallas I would not have so many miles and so much ware on my car, my son never would have been in a pool as we lived in a state where there are beaches and he never would have gotten sick and he wouldn't be suffering now and I would not be so tired nor would I look like Tammy Fae Baker did on her last Larry King interview. I looks like the Alamo was fought on my face. Dallas has aged, not to mention I have not had a real facial in almost two years.
In trying to make good decisions I seem to always end up screwed. What is it about my thought process of the way I see things happening or panning out that is so jaded.
I honestly and truly need more rope. And this time i promise I wont hang myself with it.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
LIARS
Okay, first and foremost let's take a look at the definition as it is posted on dictioary.com:..:
l
i·ar a person who tells lies. ..>
And the given definition for a lie is as follows:
lie1 noun, verb, lied, ly·ing.
–noun
1. a false statement made with deliberate intent to deceive; an intentional untruth; a falsehood.
2. something intended or serving to convey a false impression; imposture: His flashy car was a lie that deceived no one. ..>
3. an inaccurate or false statement. ..>
The word deceive as it is given in the first definition of lie is a very strong word. In order for one to deceive you they must either think you are dumb or feel some sense of intellectual superiority that gives them the impression they will be able to out wit you. Thus insulting your intelligence and showing absolutely no respect for you as a human being.
We have all told lies, tell lies and will more than likely lie in the future. In my book there is not little white lie, or harmless lie. Each false word that comes out of our mouth has a definite reaction somewhere down the line.
It is a new year and I have a new agenda....take out all liars. Catch them up in their tracks. Let them dig themselves into a hole that will be impossible to get out of and then stand there once they are all caught up and watch them scoop dirt onto the crowns of their heads until they are suffocating in their own enunciated filth.
Maybe I hate lying so much because I am not very good at it and have never really had the opportunity to reap anything positive or beneficial from the act there of. But for all those individuals who feel the need to out wit me or trick me, or fool me...I can't not wait to hear the sounds you make while suffocating and gasping for breath as you are choked by your own words.
j
l
i·ar a person who tells lies. ..>
And the given definition for a lie is as follows:
lie1 noun, verb, lied, ly·ing.
–noun
1. a false statement made with deliberate intent to deceive; an intentional untruth; a falsehood.
2. something intended or serving to convey a false impression; imposture: His flashy car was a lie that deceived no one. ..>
3. an inaccurate or false statement. ..>
The word deceive as it is given in the first definition of lie is a very strong word. In order for one to deceive you they must either think you are dumb or feel some sense of intellectual superiority that gives them the impression they will be able to out wit you. Thus insulting your intelligence and showing absolutely no respect for you as a human being.
We have all told lies, tell lies and will more than likely lie in the future. In my book there is not little white lie, or harmless lie. Each false word that comes out of our mouth has a definite reaction somewhere down the line.
It is a new year and I have a new agenda....take out all liars. Catch them up in their tracks. Let them dig themselves into a hole that will be impossible to get out of and then stand there once they are all caught up and watch them scoop dirt onto the crowns of their heads until they are suffocating in their own enunciated filth.
Maybe I hate lying so much because I am not very good at it and have never really had the opportunity to reap anything positive or beneficial from the act there of. But for all those individuals who feel the need to out wit me or trick me, or fool me...I can't not wait to hear the sounds you make while suffocating and gasping for breath as you are choked by your own words.
j
Thursday, January 15, 2009
If YOU WANT IT YOU CAN GET IT
This past Saturday I went out with a friend of mine to a lounge to support his efforts on finding a white girl. Now when I go out in Dallas I usually put very little effort into my appearance because one I am in Dallas and two I really don't want to hurt anyone with my flyness. But this particular Saturday I was in a black dress 4" stilettos and juicy reddish pink lips sort of mood. And since it was a little chilly out, I went ahead and threw on a fur to keep from catching cold, and to lok fly.
Throughout the evening I chopped it up with a few men, but one held my attention most of the time I was at the lounge. Very nice looking, smooth skin beautiful complexion and perfect teeth. And surprisingly enough he was black. I felt like I knew him from way back. He got my weird sense of humor and understood my slang. Well come to find out he was from Nevada and had spent a lot of time in Los Angele so I guess we had some sort of west coast connection. We laughed at various club-goers and shared our experiences living in Dallas.
Well towards the end of the night he offered his number and I gave him mine thinking finally I am starting to meet some cool people in Dallas. People that I can vibe with and understand. We talked well after the lights came on and as we were walking out of the club he came up behind me and whispered in my ear, "You can get it if you want it."
WTH is that. I can get it if I want. Well now I don't want it because you just let me know it was on the clearance rack. I wish I could find some sort of happy medium when it comes to men in this part of the country because I can not figure them out. Even the transplants.
He then called me later on that evening to see if I made it home safely and to reiterate his closing statement. I felt more than obliged to let him know that I thought he would make a really good friend as we seem to have quite a few things in common, but as far as anything else I really wasn't interested in a relationship whether serious or just a friend with benefits. Which was hard to say especially since, I was trying to stop my mind from wondering places it shouldn't the whole time we were talking.
These weirdos in Dallas make my celibate life more than easy when it comes to the stock of men I have to choose from. WOW, nine months, eleven days and almost two hours.
What is a girl to do?
j
Throughout the evening I chopped it up with a few men, but one held my attention most of the time I was at the lounge. Very nice looking, smooth skin beautiful complexion and perfect teeth. And surprisingly enough he was black. I felt like I knew him from way back. He got my weird sense of humor and understood my slang. Well come to find out he was from Nevada and had spent a lot of time in Los Angele so I guess we had some sort of west coast connection. We laughed at various club-goers and shared our experiences living in Dallas.
Well towards the end of the night he offered his number and I gave him mine thinking finally I am starting to meet some cool people in Dallas. People that I can vibe with and understand. We talked well after the lights came on and as we were walking out of the club he came up behind me and whispered in my ear, "You can get it if you want it."
WTH is that. I can get it if I want. Well now I don't want it because you just let me know it was on the clearance rack. I wish I could find some sort of happy medium when it comes to men in this part of the country because I can not figure them out. Even the transplants.
He then called me later on that evening to see if I made it home safely and to reiterate his closing statement. I felt more than obliged to let him know that I thought he would make a really good friend as we seem to have quite a few things in common, but as far as anything else I really wasn't interested in a relationship whether serious or just a friend with benefits. Which was hard to say especially since, I was trying to stop my mind from wondering places it shouldn't the whole time we were talking.
These weirdos in Dallas make my celibate life more than easy when it comes to the stock of men I have to choose from. WOW, nine months, eleven days and almost two hours.
What is a girl to do?
j
Weight Loss Jounral 2
sO THIS IS WEEK TWO OF THE WEIGHT LOSS EFFORT AND i HAVE DECIDED THAT i NEED TO STEP IT UP ANOTHER NOTCH. nOT ONLY WILL i BE WORKING OUT TWICE A DAY ALL WEEK NEXT WEEK, i AM GOINGT O CUT EVEN MORE OUT OF MY DIET. i HAVE GOT TO WIN THIS COMPETITION. i ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO.
wE HAVE TO WEIGH IN ON SUNDAY, AND i AM NOT SO CERTAIN THAT i AM GOING TO BE HAPPY WITH THE RESULTS. tHE PAST TWO DAYS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE ROUGH.
bUT i AM NOT THROWING IN THE TOWEL, i AM GOING TO PRESS TOWARDS THE MARK AND i WILL WIN.
j
wE HAVE TO WEIGH IN ON SUNDAY, AND i AM NOT SO CERTAIN THAT i AM GOING TO BE HAPPY WITH THE RESULTS. tHE PAST TWO DAYS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE ROUGH.
bUT i AM NOT THROWING IN THE TOWEL, i AM GOING TO PRESS TOWARDS THE MARK AND i WILL WIN.
j
Laughing @ U Not w/ U
Every year around this time I find myself in front of the television waiting for the new season of American Idol to start. I am not a fan of the show at all but I love to watch them rake through the tens of thousands of Americans that truly believe that have that spark and don't.
I don't care to see the Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson's-to-be. My main goal is to laugh uncontrollably at the William Hon's and Big Bird Girl's. I don't want to see if I can determine who will be the next American Idol by their auditions. I want to see the social rejects, the IT nerds with the harmonica's and the Goth's and with their tone death harmony and multi-colored hair.
I watch for the looks of shock and disappointment on their faces when Simon says thins like, That sounded like the noise a cat makes when it falls from the roof of the Empire State Bldg while a siren is going off.
And I am laughing at these poor people in all of their ignorance. Can they not hear themselves? Do they really not know how horrible they sound? We can hear them, but they can not hear themselves?
And I do not feel bad about it, because I feel that any that puts themselves out there is open to the response of the public.
j
I don't care to see the Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson's-to-be. My main goal is to laugh uncontrollably at the William Hon's and Big Bird Girl's. I don't want to see if I can determine who will be the next American Idol by their auditions. I want to see the social rejects, the IT nerds with the harmonica's and the Goth's and with their tone death harmony and multi-colored hair.
I watch for the looks of shock and disappointment on their faces when Simon says thins like, That sounded like the noise a cat makes when it falls from the roof of the Empire State Bldg while a siren is going off.
And I am laughing at these poor people in all of their ignorance. Can they not hear themselves? Do they really not know how horrible they sound? We can hear them, but they can not hear themselves?
And I do not feel bad about it, because I feel that any that puts themselves out there is open to the response of the public.
j
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Complainers
I CAN NOT STAND PEOPLE THAT COMPLAIN ABOUT THINGS THAT ARE OUT OF THEIR CONTROL, OR THINGS THEY SHOULD NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT AT ALL.
THERE IS A LADY AT MY JOB WHO IS JUST PLAIN OLD RUDE. AND SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE COKE ZERO THAT THE COMPANY BUYS. SO ONCE ALL THE DIET COKE IS GONE SHE IS FORCED TO DRINK THE FREE COKE ZERO AND SHE COMPLAINS ABOUT IT. WHICH FOR THE LIFE OF ME I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. IF YOU HATE THE COKE ZERO SO MUCH, STOP DRINKING IT. WALK YOUR HILLBILLIE BROKE A** 10 FEET IN THE OTHER DIRECTION TO THE VENDING MACHINE AND BUY A DIET COKE FOR $1.00 IF THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT. BUT GET OUT OF MY OFICE COMPLAINING ABOUT FREE SODA THE COMPANY DOES NOT HAVE TO PROVIDE FOR YOUR THIRSTY A**
IF I DO NOT LIKE SOMETHING I DO NOT PUT UP WITH IT OR TAKE IT JUST BECAUSE IT IS FREE. THAT IS STUPID. AND EVEN IF I AM IN ONE OF THOSE WELL IT'S FREE MOODS, I DO IT GRACEFULLY AND APPRECIATIVELY WITH MY MOUTH SHUT AND DO NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT IT IS NOT.
MAN
I HAVE TURNED INTO ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE I STARTED OUT TALKING ABOUT......grrrrrrrwwwennnfed>kddddd
THERE IS A LADY AT MY JOB WHO IS JUST PLAIN OLD RUDE. AND SHE DOES NOT LIKE THE COKE ZERO THAT THE COMPANY BUYS. SO ONCE ALL THE DIET COKE IS GONE SHE IS FORCED TO DRINK THE FREE COKE ZERO AND SHE COMPLAINS ABOUT IT. WHICH FOR THE LIFE OF ME I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. IF YOU HATE THE COKE ZERO SO MUCH, STOP DRINKING IT. WALK YOUR HILLBILLIE BROKE A** 10 FEET IN THE OTHER DIRECTION TO THE VENDING MACHINE AND BUY A DIET COKE FOR $1.00 IF THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT. BUT GET OUT OF MY OFICE COMPLAINING ABOUT FREE SODA THE COMPANY DOES NOT HAVE TO PROVIDE FOR YOUR THIRSTY A**
IF I DO NOT LIKE SOMETHING I DO NOT PUT UP WITH IT OR TAKE IT JUST BECAUSE IT IS FREE. THAT IS STUPID. AND EVEN IF I AM IN ONE OF THOSE WELL IT'S FREE MOODS, I DO IT GRACEFULLY AND APPRECIATIVELY WITH MY MOUTH SHUT AND DO NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT IT IS NOT.
MAN
I HAVE TURNED INTO ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE I STARTED OUT TALKING ABOUT......grrrrrrrwwwennnfed>kddddd
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Race Relationships
So I am sitting here at my friends birthday party and a guy friend and I were talking about a relationship issue he is facing, and the whole time he is talking to me about his current non-relationship with this one chick the only thing that came to mind is that no matter what race or how old we are relationships are the same when it comes to male/female encounters across the board.
My friend is white and his non-girl is white and he was telling me how she comes up to his job and so forth. And I started to laugh because I have so many male friends that are black that tell me they are gonna start dating white women to avoid all the drama that comes along with dating "sistas".
Well all I have to say men is that relationship drama and the cause and effect factors never change. No matter what the race, creed or social-economic status you are relationship mishaps are pretty much the same. Especially when we are dealing with men a and women who are immature.
Don't think for a second men that white women will not put your shit outside, or show up to your job or put holes in condoms. Because they do.
I just read a BB message archive that proves it on my friends phone that proves it is so.
If you as man continually meet women who do not demonstrate stable behavior maybe you may want to take a look at your behavior and see what it is you are doing to merit such negative and unwanted rebuttals from the women you are dating.
Just food for thought.
j
My friend is white and his non-girl is white and he was telling me how she comes up to his job and so forth. And I started to laugh because I have so many male friends that are black that tell me they are gonna start dating white women to avoid all the drama that comes along with dating "sistas".
Well all I have to say men is that relationship drama and the cause and effect factors never change. No matter what the race, creed or social-economic status you are relationship mishaps are pretty much the same. Especially when we are dealing with men a and women who are immature.
Don't think for a second men that white women will not put your shit outside, or show up to your job or put holes in condoms. Because they do.
I just read a BB message archive that proves it on my friends phone that proves it is so.
If you as man continually meet women who do not demonstrate stable behavior maybe you may want to take a look at your behavior and see what it is you are doing to merit such negative and unwanted rebuttals from the women you are dating.
Just food for thought.
j
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Weight Loss Jounral 1
So I made a bet with a lady at church that we both had to have 20lbs off by the first of march and we made a little friendly wager.
I have started to this process and I am proud to say that thus far the scales are tipping in my favor.
I have used various weight loss remedies before that gave me instant results with minimal effort other than discipline.
Actually working towards this goal with the little progress I have made makes me feel good. I am doing it and I am doing it on my own. Well not completely. A friend trains me and I have a son who is "dieting" with me to help me loose the lbs and inches.
I will be sharing my progress with the www which will hopefully help me stay focused.
Like Ruby, I CAN.
j
I have started to this process and I am proud to say that thus far the scales are tipping in my favor.
I have used various weight loss remedies before that gave me instant results with minimal effort other than discipline.
Actually working towards this goal with the little progress I have made makes me feel good. I am doing it and I am doing it on my own. Well not completely. A friend trains me and I have a son who is "dieting" with me to help me loose the lbs and inches.
I will be sharing my progress with the www which will hopefully help me stay focused.
Like Ruby, I CAN.
j
Monday, January 5, 2009
Joseph
My sacrifice is for his growth and my heartache is for his joy. My love is all his and he is my world.
His laugh tickles me, his cry pricks me and his smile reminds me.
I believe in his dreams, chastise him for his behavior and build his esteem.
I will hoist him on my back throughout the hardest leg of the journey. I will tie him in my arms. I nurtured him in my womb.
I know he will be great, I want him to have success, I pray he will be happy
Joseph
I believe in his dreams, chastise him for his behavior and build his esteem.
I will hoist him on my back throughout the hardest leg of the journey. I will tie him in my arms. I nurtured him in my womb.
I know he will be great, I want him to have success, I pray he will be happy
Joseph
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